Like many people my age, I'd never wallpapered before. Wallpaper was something of days gone by that was in your childhood home or the outdated rental you moved into and that you immediately took down (not that it was easy, mind you!). You probably had at least a wallpaper border at some point in your life, or if you were lucky, the bottom half of your room was papered and a wallpaper border was on top.
Like this:
You totally know what I mean, right?
Anyways, back to my lesson. Last night was wallpaper night in our household. We had all of the equipment, including a 'wallpapering kit', wallpaper paste, a big cutting surface and a tape measure. We had the advice of experienced wallpaper installers (my dad) and were ready to start.
Once we got moving, I learned a very important lesson that I wanted to impart on you, my lovely readers who have been with me through thick and thin.
The lesson is this:
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO WALLPAPER. EVER.
I am not joking. Sure, it looks nice in the homes of designers. And even maybe the homes of your in-laws. But let me tell you. It is TOUGH and FRUSTRATING and SWEARWORD INDUCING and YOU ARE PUTTING YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH WHOEVER YOU ROPE INTO HELPING YOU AT RISK.
This is how it started. Nice and easy. J made a level line inside from the corner wall so that the first piece would be level.
Then came the 'easy' part. This wallpaper is "Paste the Wall" technology, which is supposed to be the NEXT BIG THING in wallpaper. Instead of pasting the back of the paper, booking it and waiting, you simply roll the paste on the wall and hang the paper.
Easy Peasy.
However, the roller we had wouldn't roll properly and the paste that was supposed to stick to the wall started dripping everywhere (eek! New carpet!) and the cursing started almost immediately. Lining the paper up with the pencil mark was not as easy as I thought it should have been and the edges seemed to dry instantly and wouldn't stick.
Using the brush thingy from the 'wallpapering kit' didn't get the bubbles out and only seemed to leave indents in the paste underneath and we had to lift and reset the paper a million times. I tried using my hand because it seemed to work for a bit but then I saw that the silver from the paper was getting all over my hands and then rubbing all over the white bits on the wallpaper. Ugh.
And that was the first piece.
Next comes lining up the second piece with the first. On walls that are not perfectly straight. With a self-diagnosed rageaholic wife. Not fun.
I threw away the 'wallpaper kit' for this one and started using a big yellow plastic scraper. This seemed to work better but this time it was like there wasn't enough paste. Could have been the fact it took us ages to line it up with the first piece and making sure it didn't overlap.
So we quit. At 11:15 p.m., we threw in the
towel paste and went to bed. The wallpaper wasn't going anywhere (hopefully!).
This is where we are. I could leave you with just this photo that makes everything look peachy:
...but as I've mentioned before, this isn't one of those "I only show perfectly styled pictures of my home" kind of blog*** so here is a picture of reality:
So friends...take it from me. Even when you get all juiced up at Home Depot looking at a particularly nice roll of paper and you turn to your husband/partner/whatever and say "can we?!", remember this piece of advice:
DON'T**
*** Not to say I don't love all those styled pictures, because oh, I do! I just am not capable of doing that so I am just telling/showing it like it is. If you have one of those fancy styled blogs, please keep doing it because I need something to drool over and envy :-)
** This advice is given solely to the DIY'ers out there. If you are one of those people who 'has a guy' for everything, go ahead. Wallpaper is beautiful and makes a statement. But for the love of God/Diet Dr. Pepper, PAY SOMEONE to install it.